Quit Playin’: Uncle Ben Can Double Stuff It!

By Vincent L. Hall

When Massa Trump relented and agreed to put a fly in all that Buttermilk, he found the right one. Trump thinks like a slave master so it follows that he secured the best “House Nigger” that an annual salary of $199,700 could buy. Ben Carson ain’t no actor, but if the movie Django Unchained’s “Colored CEO” Stephen got sick; Ben would be the perfect double.

Trump has a tidy little group of representatives from NUTS, (The National Uncle Tom Syndicate) who do his bidding. He has those two “Mammy” impersonators that go by the names “Diamond” and “Silk.” He has a millennial “Black,” Candace Owens, who’s so brazen that she gives her full government name. But Uncle Tom Ben Carson is the highest-ranking Negro Trump has under contract. All of this sounds like a joke, but it’s a fact that urban and rural America are dealing with a lack of housing options for people making less than $50,000 per household. The present level of homelessness and them steep decline in lower, middle-income home ownership make Carson’s appearance before the House

Financial Services Committee an intolerable travesty. “I’d also like for you to get back to me – if you don’t mind – to explain the disparity in REO rates. Do you know what an REO is,” California Democratic Rep. Katie Porter asked. Carson responded, “OREO?” “No, not an Oreo. An REO,” Porter shot back, explaining she was asking about real-estate owned properties. Shortly afterward, her office captured the exchange for Twitter posterity.

“I asked @SecretaryCarson about REOs – a basic term related to foreclosure – at a hearing today,” she tweeted. “He thought I was referring to a chocolate sandwich cookie. No, really.” Hold the tape…wait…Did this foot-shuffling, kowtowing, bootlicking Bozo just get the essence of his job confused with the essence of his confused character? REO is a designation of properties that are in the Feds possession post-foreclosure.

Oreo is a damning diminutive used to belittle a Black person. An Oreo is Black on the outside and White on the inside…get it!! Carson played dumb when he was grilled by Rep. Porter, but he got downright indignant when questioned by Rep. Ayanna Pressley, the first African-American female to represent Massachusetts.

The Washington Post synopsized their exchange. “Then, near the end of the hearing, freshman Rep. Ayanna Pressley (D-Mass.) chided Carson and the Trump administration for failing to improve conditions in low-income housing. During a lightning round in which Pressley wanted yes-or-no answers to her questions, Carson failed to provide them. “During one particularly contentious moment, Carson said, “Reclaiming my time.” “You don’t get to do that,” Pressley retorted. She then asked Carson if he would allow his grandmother to live in public housing under his watch. “It would be very nice if you could stop . . .” Carson trailed off, and Pressley’s time expired. Maybe Carson thought Pressley was playing the “Dozens.”

After all, Carson’s success as a celebrated neurosurgeon came after he and his recently divorced mother were forced to live with his aunt and uncle in Boston. If anyone should have a heart for families who have fallen on hard times or find themselves in transition, you would think Captain Oreo would. At this very moment, there are 17 homeless people per 10,000 in America…That we know of. The Atlantic recently reported that almost 50% of renters in America spend 35% or more of their income on rent alone. Meanwhile, Carson saunters over to Congress to bullshit and lollygag about one of the most important issues of our day. Later, he had the nerve to tweet himself holding a bag of Oreos as if it was funny. Next time, Uncle Tom Ben Carson…get the “Double Stuffed.”

Hopefully, you don’t need me to tell you where to stuff them! Yeah…I said it, and if he’s considerate, Uncle Ben can grab a bag of Oreos for that Oreo at SCOTUS too!