MY TRUTH: These are the times!

By Cheryl Smith

I met my sorority sister Cheryl Hickmon when she was a regional representative of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority. During the time we spent together it wasn’t an easy time because we were gathered in Dallas, TX for the national convention and several sorors were on a plane traveling to the convention when Delta Airlines Flight 191 crashed.

So many lives were lost.

As we tried to continue with convention activities and Delta business, the times were challenging and very emotional as we also waited to hear information about the condition of Dr. Kathleen Cooper Wright, the current Southern Regional Director, who was injured on the flight and later transitioned.

I recall it being a tough time.

It was a similar feeling this week when the news came of the passing of now President Cheryl Hickmon. Yes, from the time she was initiated at South Carolina State University, to this day, Soror Cheryl rose through the ranks; leading on so many fronts only to have her silenced as she prepared to take our wonderful sisterhood to higher heights.

Soror President Cheryl did good work as a Delta and even more for humanity.

It was devastating news to hear. Following a rich legacy, anticipation would be a good word to describe how many were feeling about the Hickmon reign and where she would lead our precious sisterhood and communities internationally.

I received calls, texts and emails from all over. Many know how Deltas love our sorority and our sisters.

After a long day, the next day I got a call that Linda Barrett Neal had passed. A realtor and community servant, Linda was such a beautiful and caring person.

I would contact Linda often, especially since last summer after the death of her only child, Nicole Barrett. I tried to follow the directives of so many pastors who said “be there for the family” after time goes on and people go their merry ways. So I made contact with Linda frequently. I know she missed her daughter immensely and she was also dealing with challenging health conditions.

I was saddened by her death and tried to think positive thoughts as the next day I made my way to the Hall of State for the visitation for a wonderful sister, Debra Jones.

Like Cheryl and Linda, Debra touched so many lives in a positive way. She was a wonderful person who brought joy and a smile when she entered a room. She was about lifting as she climbed, helping to educate and enlighten our youth.

As if there weren’t enough hits this week, another came as the week came to a close.

When I was a young pre-teen running around the streets of East Orange, NJ with my friend Patrice, we’d often see two older men (well not really that old — maybe about five years older) Patrice’s brother Aundre and his friend Clif Sneed.

Years later I arrived in Dallas, TX and Clif was already here so Aundre told him he’d better look me up. Clif loved to come by and take me to Outback Restaurants and I loved taking him to Black-owned restaurants for him to treat me!

When he returned me home I would usually have the pleasure of teaching him new words during games of Scrabble.

I won’t be obnoxious. I’ll just say we had some spirited contests that were usually won by the Wordmeister!

Eventually Clif decided that we needed to diversify, so we included his wife Marva and later his assistant, Lori for games of Spades and Bid Whist.

Now I learned how to play Bid Whist at FAMU— it was actually the first “A” I received!

Well, I would have received an A had it been a class!

Still if you sat at my table, you usually didn’t win, unless you were my partner.

So there were many times that I am sure when Clif, Marva and Lori were in the car traveling home they didn’t have nice things to say about me because in Spades and Bid Whist, they were grass and I was the lawn mower.

We shared so many wonderful times together that I have to focus on those memories to help during the times when I have to take a heavy sigh; like Friday night when Clif transitioned.

A flood of memories overtook me as I recalled him attending the Don’t Believe the Hype Celebrity Bowl-a-thons and supporting me in whatever endeavors I undertook. He remained true to his commitment to his “lil nappy-headed sister!”

Forever, when I am playing Scrabble, Words with Friends, Spades or Bid Whist; I will remember the looks he gave me when I did what I do!

Which brings me to my truth.

Love is so beautiful. Life is so beautiful.

Find the joy in life while you can. Find joy in the people you come into contact with because otherwise you may be missing out on someone very special.

Granted, some people aren’t the joyful type, you say. Well, try ensuring that you aren’t that person!

Don’t wait until it’s time to say goodbye to recognize great things about a person.
Life will be so much better for you, based on how you view it!

Thanks for the memories, Cheryl, Linda, Debra and Clif.